So you want me to review your book? Before asking, please consider the following.
Sorry. I used to have a policy of “ask me nicely”, but some people interpreted that to mean “keep pestering me until I say yes”. So the policy now is that if you ask me to review your book I will not do so. Your only chance of getting a review is not asking me.
Yes, I know that this makes me a horrible, evil person. I have been called evil many times during my life so one more won’t hurt.