Yesterday I was up and dressed around 7:00am (which for me is the middle of the night) because I can never be sure when the carers will turn up. Most of the rest of the day was spent dealing with medical visitors of one sort or another, or on errands to do with patient care, or being on the phone to various medical people. The nature of the discussions gradually escalated through the day, culminating in a decision to take my mother into hospital that evening. I finally got home at around midnight.
The good news is that Mum will be far better cared for in hospital than she will be at home. There’s no way, even with the three carer visits and one nurse visit a day we were getting, that we can provide the same level of care that 24-hour nurse support can give. When you are very ill, the slightest thing can knock you down, and you need help to get back up again.
On the downside, my days from now on are going to revolve around visiting a hospital in another town. The train station locations are not convenient at either end, and while there is a bus I travel very badly on such things and will happily walk miles to and from train stations to avoid using them. The best solution is to hire a car, and the weekly hire rates don’t seem too bad. Longer term I need to buy one, and with Kevin’s help I’ve just extracted a large portion of my savings from the USA and can start looking for something second hand. I have an awful feeling I’ll need to get used to driving a manual again.
As yet I have no idea what this is going to do to my available time. It is likely that the hospital will want Mum home again as soon as possible, but how many days that means I do not know.
When my father was in his final stay at the hospital for something like two months, I drove from UCLA every day (I was in grad school at the time) to the hospital in Panorama City (North San Fernando Valley, about 20 miles) and did my thesis work from his bedside. It was a pain to get there and certainly not an optimal place to do my work. I don’t regret a single a minute of it.
Sorry to hear about your Mum. These things are never easy for the person concerned and the immediate family. At the end of the day if you can say you did your best, then that is all your Mum or anyone can ask of you. Hope things improve for the both of you.